Industry expectation from I-Bankers

IDC, the global IT industry tracker brings out some insights on what the industry expects from IT vendors.  The top 3 expectations are (a) very competitive pricing (2) support for industry standards (3) industry/vertical knowledge. 

I wish there were some trackers for India’s half baked business advisory firms that masquerade as investment bankers.  So I imagine what business would expect from such crass performers.  Here’s my wish list.

Ok, stuffed suits, hear me out. Be something more than just –

a) EPS calculators and BS aggregators [BS – I mean `balance sheet’ here; not the popular expansion though it fits better contextually 🙂 ] ;

b)  template runners; Dump that smug one-size-fits-all assumption.  Don’t take the mandate if you are not sure how to go about the transaction.  Don’t screw up.

c)  pushers of outrageous merger proposals; we know your slogan is “anything so long as it earns us fees”.

d) crass creators of PowerPoint slides throwing back at us not much more than what we had discussed with you;  we know you are too dumb to learn about our business.  We just use you to run some errands for us. Can’t you do that bit nicely, mate…?

e)   compliance service providers; we know how to file forms with regulators.

f)  pretenders of industry knowledge; do some research and bring back some useful insights adding value to our business.

g) fawning client-pleasers ; No we don’t want you to grovel. Make sure the transaction is not just earnings accretive, it should result in customer delight as well.

The points (a)-(f) is general industry perception (including PE fund managers) about quality of I-Bankers and their deteriorating service levels while (g) above is an insider perception from fellow I-Bankers. I’d discussed about this to some champion advisors.  They all had agreed it’s a valid point yet they have no choice in this dog eat dog world.  When I checked last, each of their last transaction had destroyed phenomenal value for both shareholders and customers.  I have blogged about other potential value destroying FCCB transactions here in detail.

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